Relationships : Take it from someone who KNOWS

A big part of my New Year’s resolutions for 2014 is to keep negativity out of my life. But that doesn’t mean that when my friends come to me for advice I’ll be covering my ears (like a kid… La La La). Even though 2013 was a dynamic and stressful year for me, one thing that I’m proud I’ve gotten right is my relationship.

I’ve been dating Michael for almost a year and a half now. He’s part Lebanese/Syrian and part Ethiopian. He speaks both English and French (bonus points for Frenglish!). He can dance, he can cook and he’s frankly one of the most handsome guys I’ve ever met.

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A lot of my girl friends are single and from time to time we have girl nights out that usually end with sore feet from dancing, smudged make-up and someone muttering, “All boys are the same anyway!” I think every girl who’s ever liked a guy probably thought this aloud once, and her friends agreed.

But girls, WHO is telling you this stuff ?! We’re so used to taking advice from our closest friends but unless they’ve been through what we have, how can their advice help our situation ?

Example #1
You just started seeing a guy and he hasn’t texted you all day. Your single friend Ashley concludes, “He doesn’t care about you, you shouldn’t text him first !” Actually, DO text him first. Chances are, he’s thinking the same thing or maybe he doesn’t want to look clingy.

Example #2
You have been dating your man for three years now and everything’s perfect. Except that you keep fighting about stupid stuff like, when he comes over, he finishes the toilet paper and doesn’t replace it AND leaves the empty roll there (agggghhh !). Your single friend Ashley tells you, “Don’t complain about that stuff or he’ll think you’re crazy. Just be happy he’s not cheating!”
Actually, talk to anyone in a long-term relationship and he/she will tell you that their relationship has pet peeves too. Instead of not complaining about it, talk to your boyfriend. Because unless you do that, little issues will keep piling up until it becomes a big deal.

Example #3
“He’s totally into you ! Go for it!” Your single friend Ashley exclaims as you try to figure out your crush’s last text that said “Hey :-)”. Just because there’s a smiley face there does not mean he likes you and you should tell him how you feel. Believe me, don’t make that mistake, it doesn’t end well.

Example #4
“Don’t continue your relationship when you go to Turkey next semester. Long distance relationships never work!” Your single Ashley exclaims. Now you’re caught between not going at all or breaking up with him. Personally, long distance is not for me because it never worked with me and my multi-personality ex-boyfriend. That being said, only YOU and your boyfriend can decide what’s best for you guys. Maybe it’ll be horrible so you’ll cry and write a song. Maybe it will work. But Ashley isn’t dating your boyfriend, YOU are.

I know this all seems like common sense but just think about it: how many times have you listened to that friend of yours who clearly has no idea what she’s talking about ?

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not telling you to ignore single girls’ advice. I’m just saying, take it from someone who knows.

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