The Best Friend Post

Yesterday was National Best Friend Day apparently. (Pretty Little Liars’ Facebook page reminded me of that, it’s not like I wrote it on my calendar or anything, I mean who does that anymore?)

Up until the age of 14, every person I met was my best friend. However, over the years I’ve realized that the French saying “Les amis se comptent sur les doigts d’une main” is completely true. Well, it would be if I had six fingers. (Translation: “You can count your friends on the fingers of your hand…” which doesn’t sound half as wise.)

To honor National Best Friend Day, here’s a list of the six type of best friends (in random order) you’ll most likely have in your early 20’s, or if you’re me. Please note that there are about three other people that should be added to this list, but hey, I only have so many fingers.

1) The two-peas-in-a-pod best friend

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She’s the type of friend who will physically be there no matter where you go. Inseparable, you’ll always be at each other’s places, without ever getting in each other’s way. And if you are apart, you’ll somehow be in contact, whether it’s texting “IMBECILEEEE :)” every morning or calling each other while using the bathroom. My two-peas-in-a-pod friend is Leila, there for me whenever I need her, and whenever I don’t.

2) The walk-down-memory-lane best friend

© All Rights Reserved 2014
© All Rights Reserved 2014

Because she’s known you since you were an awkward 13-and-a-half year old, she knows you by the “pink-clothes-obsession” stage, the “pretending-to-be-a-novelist” stage and the “let’s-pretend-we’re-in-Gossip Girl” stage. Somehow she still owes you a long-overdue email, and about 100 Skype phone calls, but you still manage to stay in contact and up-to-date with each other’s lives. My walk-down-memory-lane friend is Jemy, a.k.a Lady Purple, her MSN screen name in 2009.

3) The non-family-member-but-is best friend

© All Rights Reserved 2014
© All Rights Reserved 2014

You still don’t remember how you really became friends. It involved something like baking cookies and unicorns, and then you went from hating each other to camping in her backyard. Your family loves her, you love her, her family loves you, you love them, it’s all just love. My non-family member friend is Lex, because I’ll never be surprised if she surprises me by popping out of my closet one day. It’ll be totally normal because I’d assume it’s her closet too.

4) The adventures-of-you-and-her best friend

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© All Rights Reserved 2014 – Darkside Paris

If you walked home in broken heels, hungry, tired, thirsty, dying to pee, but still laughing, it was with her. If you listened to west African music for three hours straight, while trying to smell cardboard, while watching an 80’s TV show that somebody else put on, while making green tea, it was with her. If you ate a post-party kebab at 4am, it was with her. Through the good and the bad, she’s the friend who stars in every adventure you’ve had. My adventures-of-you-and-her friend is Laura because no matter where we are, we’re never bored with each other.

5) The wise-owl best friend

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You can tell her absolutely anything in the world about yourself and she won’t get mad. But just get ready for the “OH MY GOD ZAHRA, NO!” and really wise-beyond-your-years advice. There will always be a solution with her, and if not, a piece of advice that you may or may not take and end up skyping her again for more. Nehanda is my wise-owl friend because no matter what I get myself into, she will always know what to do and what to say.

6) The sister

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After years of bossing her around, it was time you grew into young women who swapped clothes constantly. When you were little, people thought you were twins and you would proudly announce “NO, I’m 3 years older!”. Now, you boast proudly (for no reason, because it’s a total lie) that you’re “twins and she was born five minutes earlier”. You are inseparable when you see each other, you’re two peas in a pod. She’s always quick to say, “Hey, ‘member when we pretended we liked it when she’d pour warm milk in our cereal and it got soggy?” because she’s your walk-down-memory-lane. Her family loves you, you love her family, because you have the same family. The adventures-of-you-and-her usually start with “Zahra made me do it, I’m the cute one!” And she’s your wise-owl because when things get real, she tells it like it is. And though she’s obsessed with sending me obscure hipster music, Safiya is my bestest friend in the universe, because she’s my sister.

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